Friendly Divorce: Is it Possible?

friendly divorceThe decision to get a divorce marks the start of what will likely be a long and complicated process. Divorce involves more than just signing sheets of paper and going your own ways. Breaking a marital bond means agreeing on everything, compromising with each other, and knowing the hidden complications to achieve a fair and comfortable settlement.

Here are a few ways to work collaboratively:

Know What Really Happened

The end of a relationship can create emotional distress and trigger negative feelings like anger and disappointment. This is often because you blame each other or are seeking revenge to ease resentments. Instead of accusing one another, understand what both of you did that let to divorce. Find a non-accusing way of discovering why your marriage failed at different levels.

Cooperate With Your Spouse

Avoid handling the settlement process by making the same mistakes that ruined your relationship. Know the skills that were missing in your marriage and use those to make the divorce settlement cooperative. Divorce lawyers from suggest aiming for a collaborative discussion and sharing decision-making responsibilities.

Acknowledge Your Mistakes

Try to discover your own mistakes and look at the ways in which you have been a less considerate partner. Look back at any habits that may have led to your spouse’s disappointment, anger, or hatred. It is also important to look at the things you have done that put your marriage at risk. Acknowledging your mistakes and correcting them early on can help you get through the process.

Talk to Family and Friends

Talk to someone you trust to ease any feelings of anger, sadness, and fear. This can help you move through the process and accept reality more easily. Don’t keep your feelings to yourself as you may be at risk for releasing your feelings through self-defeating actions.

It is important to remember that divorce is a gradual process and not a one-time action. Give yourself enough time to work your way through the disengagement process. Choosing the right divorce lawyer is also important to help you negotiate a mutually fair settlement.

About the Author

As a New York-based psychologist. Thelma Scott has conducted several seminars tackling adult autism.